“Listen, I love your family. I do. But if your brother calls me 'champ' one more time I'm going to become the kind of person who flips a table at Thanksgiving and honestly I think I'd be justified.”
While drivingApril 3, 2026112 votes
It gets worse
“Do not come at me about the credit card bill when you literally bought a boat last year because, and I quote, 'it spoke ...”
— My wife267 votes
“I married you for your personality. I stay for the health insurance.”
— My wife247 votes
“Let me get this straight. You forgot to pick up milk, which I texted you about three times with pictures, and your defen...”
— My wife234 votes
Bet you have one too.
Submit a quote